Poetry Night – Mercury Cafe – Denver, CO
I have always been a yes person. Through and through. If I am asked to do something and it sounds even somewhat appealing I will usually say yes. This might sound great, but it has a tendency to get me into trouble. Not because saying yes is a bad thing but because I would say yes to everything and because I am human and get exhausted or forget things I would end up having to cancel last minute or I just wouldn’t show up. I am not using being human as an excuse… I am right now, taking full responsibility for my actions.
There have been many times when I have been called a ‘flake’ and people get mad when you don’t have integrity to your word. Which leaves me always feeling a little powerless. Plus, people really take it personally if you don’t show up somewhere they invited you or if you say yes and cancel. Even though I don’t operate this way, I appreciate people who do. This got me thinking as I began to embark upon a new adventure. How can I learn to say yes to things I really want to say yes to but then say no or maybe to the rest.
No or maybe allow for space to change your mind more acceptably. If you tell a friend you aren’t going to be somewhere and then you change your mind to go they are always stoked and excited. It is interesting that when you cancel or change your mind the opposite way it isn’t as accepted and the outcome has the potential to be less than positive. I realized through exploring this pattern in myself that I usually say yes, not because I always want to go but because I am 1. an excitable person and I really do enjoy doing most things but 2. I also don’t want people to not like me. I want everyone to like me and everyone loves a yes person, until they have to change their minds.
When I pulled away from Arkansas, I gave myself full permission to experiment with my life in every way possible. Experiment with saying yes to things I usually wouldn’t say yes to or saying no to things that I might usually say yes to.
Experimentation Life Project is going swimmingly!! I have only canceled on one person and it was for a legitimate reason, my apartment had some flooding that I had to take care of.
I have said no to things that don’t work for me. I was at a friends house and it was getting late and they offered me a place to sleep. I was so tired that I wanted to take it, but I knew I wouldn’t sleep well there and I had a long day of work the next day so I said NO, thank you and I got up and made my way home. Saying no empowered me to take control over my life and how I feel.
I also went to visit a friend in a different city in Colorado. We had a great day exploring and then all the sudden I hit a wall and needed to leave. My friend had just begun dinner and usually I would have just stayed and not listened to my body. But not listening to what I need is no longer an option. I sweetly said my goodbyes and drove back to Denver.
I also have been saying YES to things that take me out of my comfort zone! I said yes to meeting up with a new friend for a drink one evening and he knew very little about me. He knew I was a writer. He knew that I didn’t know much about Denver. After we had a drink, he looked at his watch and said so there is this cafe that has poetry readings on Friday nights at 10pm, you want to go?
I looked at him and said YES! I had never read my poetry out loud to a crowd before. I have shared my poetry and allowed others to read it…but never have I stood in front of a room of strangers and poured my heart to them…well until last Friday.
The picture above pretty much explains the whole thing. Saying YES to my life in each moment has set me on fire. It has given me confidence, trust, and so much joy! I left Mercury Cafe in Denver more on fire to write than ever. I left Mercury Cafe in love with my life. In love with my courage. In love with myself.
From now on I am saying YES to life. Yes to the things that stretch me. Yes to the things that help me grow and evolve and inspire me!! YES YES YES, Universe I am here. I am saying YES. My promise is that when the next step is revealed I will leap forward. I will trust you. I am open. I am ready.
I am going to take a moment and sit in silence and allow the goodness to wash over me. Life is so good.
Pause for a minute and let what is good in your life wash over you…feel it? Doesn’t it feel amazing to acknowledge the good!
My promise is to also honor what I need in each moment and to say no to all things that don’t serve me or that I am not 100% sure I want to take on.
Learning to say yes and no is learning how to operate differently in the world. Learning how to operate inside of boundaries that work for you and your life. It is saying yes to you. This is what will give us energy to put our all into things that set us on fire. This is what will keep us in alignment with our integrity and what we value. This is such a powerful thing to learn.
Also I give you full permission to play, explore, and experiment in your life too. It is pretty freakin’ rad!!!
I would love to hear what is coming up for you!
Love from Denver,