I’ve been struggling with body image lately. I haven’t been as active and I’ve been super social (eating and drinking all of the things) saying goodbye to good friends. Celebrating my last few weeks in Arkansas. Yet instead of just being in the bliss I have found myself picking at myself. I should be eating better. I should be exercising more. I should be this or that… Saying things like…
Great Kimberly you will show up in Denver and not be attractive and then no one will hire you and you won’t get what you want… once again. I mean the list goes on…
This is what our brains do. Because I am in this space I want to speak to it. I want to speak to the ideas of self-love and self-care. I believe there is a misconception…
Many people believe that self-love and self-care is some moment in time when all of the sudden poof: you no longer nit pick your body, you no longer emotionally eat cookie dough in the middle of the night, your weight no longer fluctuates, you make it to every yoga class you’ve paid for, and you get massages twice a month to show yourself how much you mean to yourself, and you never have a negative thought about who you are…
SORRY TO BURST YOUR BUBBLE…
THIS IS NOW HOW SELF-CARE AND SELF-LOVE WORKS
Well maybe for some people it is how it works. Yet I can be almost 100% sure that they still have moments of self depreciation, self doubt, judgement, harshness… all of things that humans deal with.
You are human. We are here on a journey. There is no destination to reach… it is the journey.
To take care of ourselves and to love ourselves is a life long practice.
It is a cultivation of presence and knowing yourself.
It is a cultivation of listening to your gut and then honoring the calls that come from deep within.
It is a moment by moment process of listening, taking action, being gentle when you don’t take action, and then repeating.
We aren’t always going to honor what we need. We aren’t always going to love our bodies. We aren’t always going to do what we know is best for us. We aren’t perfect.
Perfection is not the point of life.
The point of life is
We are here with the opportunity to play and learn to dance with ourselves. Dance in the moments of being aligned and in-tune. Dance in the moments of spending minutes in the mirror poking and prodding. Dance in the moments of judgment. Dance in the moments of compassion.
As we dance we will perfect some steps and we will fumble on others. We will learn new moves and forget those not used in time. It is this dance that is the beauty and magic of living.
This dance is longer than most. It will last until we breathe our last breath and dance into the other realm.
Aldous Huxley always pop in my head when I think about being gentle with myself, especially in times when I tend to see my flaws more than my wholeness and beauty…
“It’s dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly. Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply. Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them. So throw away your baggage and go forward. There are quicksands all about you, sucking at your feet, trying to suck you down into fear and self-pity and despair. That’s why you must walk so lightly. Lightly my darling…”
― Aldous Huxley,
In this moment I place my hands on my belly and breathe in lightness. Notice my heartbeat. Notice the rise and fall of my breath. Honoring where I am NOW. Accepting and embracing this step in the journey and on the path. Knowing my body will change and evolve as it will and acknowledging that my body will never be the same as it is today. Today is a special day for my body. It is the only day it will live on May 23rd, 2016. It is special because this day and moment will never happen again, exactly like this.
May we all take in this moment. May we all walk lightly. Being gentle on our paths. Being gentle with ourselves. Being gentle with others. May we all walk and enjoy the journey we are on. Each moment. The hills. The valleys. And the peaks!
Lightly my darling…